Northland Armed Forces may consider “limited call up of reservists”

A spokesperson for the Northland Armed Forces has confirmed that the NAF might consider a “limited call up of reservists” if the crisis South of the Border grows any worse.

Such a mobilization of reserves—last seen during the Great Maple Syrup Shortage of 2015—would follow either declaration of a state of emergency by the federal government, or a request from the Ontario government for assistance under the Emergencies Act.

Chief of the Defence Staff General Daryl Cartier expressed confidence in the NAF’s ability to deal with any eventuality. “Despite having an underfunded regular forces component and reservists with decades-old hand-me-down equipment, the NAF is second to none. During the Zombie Invasion of 1812 our brave Northlands forces turned back the invaders, and we’re ready to do it again.”

He was quick to add that it was unlikely to prove necessary to burn down the White House again this time, however.